Archive - How Not to F*ck Up Your Face

How to Make a Pretty Mouth

that one time Trinny Woodall strong-armed me into a lip liner

Jul 7 • Valerie Monroe

June 2026

Menopausal Ears

the unfortunate result of an uninvited fungal element

Jun 30 • Valerie Monroe

plus, why you're often disappointed with your skincare

Jun 23 • Valerie Monroe

The Temples of Youth

I prefer to worship elsewhere, but that's just me

Jun 16 • Valerie Monroe

Facing the Peptide Revolution

plus, what makes me mad

Jun 9 • Valerie Monroe

Bargains Galore

plus, minimizing the mustache

Jun 2 • Valerie Monroe

May 2026

A Half-Off Birthday Sale 🎂

plus, is that hair growth serum working?

May 26 • Valerie Monroe

a 73-year-old woman gets naked in public

May 19 • Valerie Monroe

What Makes the Best Facial Oils?

more like velvet, less like vinaigrette. plus, a rare discount!

May 12 • Valerie Monroe

A (Bio)stimulating Confusion

plus, I am not my neck

May 5 • Valerie Monroe

April 2026

plus, banisters

Apr 28 • Valerie Monroe

The Broken Capillary Blues

plus, the joy of getting lost

Apr 21 • Valerie Monroe

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