plus, a moment of neediness from your devoted correspondent
It is an irrefutable universal law that if you forgo the bra or leave the house in pilly, stretched out anything, you will run into people you know. And that is true at any age, so do not think of this as age-related. And for an account of a similar mishap, please enjoy Melissa McCarthy's Spanx story and feel less alone: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-xrRWYouKy0
Those lucky guys!!! Wish I'd been there to see them blush.
It is not uncommon for me to panic in the grocery line when I notice people trying hard not to notice me. I recently asked myself DID I FORGET MY PANTS? as I tapped my thighs, feeling for fabric. (I had not.) Publicly worn slippers and uncombed hair are de rigueur. I think of these not as oversights, but as evidence that I'm solving world problems. We need to be judicious with our brain-space! I'm sure you were riding that elevator, plotting how to make ten thousand readers feel good about themselves... and you did it! At least for this one.
Any age. One sunny day when I was in my early 30s I rode the subway from Brooklyn to midtown, walked several blocks to my office and into the lobby before the kind and amused doorman pointed out that I only had one lens in my sunglasses.
There was a day, a lovely day, when I was running a ton of errands and everyone was looking me in the eyes and smiling kindly, all so friendly, and I just thought, "This is such a lovely day!" And then I caught a glimpse of myself in the rearview mirror as I was getting in the car (after my 4th or 5th errand) and noticed a huge black streak on my left cheek (no idea what the hell it was or how it got there). Not one of those kind jerks had the humanity in them to tell me (I'm not all that vain so rarely check myself in the mirror). So, if you have something in your teeth, a mark somewhere, your fly is open, honey, I will tell you. Solidarity! xo
Am I the only one who needs to know more about the corset? Is it to avoid a 'hump neck', or to straighten the spine?
Somehow the Internet knows I am trying to avoid a hump/tech neck and is sending me ads. I've already bought a foam neck cradle thing to use 15 minutes a day, but have yet to use it regularly. I thought about buying a brace-type posture bra thing but haven't pulled the trigger.
Dear Val, first let me assure you that you are not writing into the void! And you are definitely not alone in having moments when you wonder whether you’re turning into “that old woman…” we swore we’d never become.
I live in a building designated as a “mixed dwelling” with only a handful of residential tenants; the rest are commercial tenants. Businesses include architects, wealth management, photography studios and other fashion-related operations. Which means that the passengers I encounter in the elevator are mostly young, hip and stylishly turned out—and often include preternaturally gorgeous models.
So before I go down to the lobby to retrieve our New York Times, even if I’m still in my Nike sweatpants, I put on a nice top and comb my hair. Feeling even a tad pulled together is a mood booster.
Even so, there are times when I realize that I left my grocery list at home while en route to Fairway. But at least my hair is combed! Thanks again for a fun, fab post. And the excellent tutorial on SP!
Oh! I always have to check the zipper on my trousers. For some reason, especially getting out of elevators. This has been a near-lifelong twitchy habit. So I wonder if perhaps as I get older I can release that anxiety by leaning into this just wander out in my nightie thing...
YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
Am now paying the piper for my sun-loving years . . . Versed has a retinol body lotion I like for Houston’s hotter months. Will look into these recommendations too! Thanks, Val!
(Edited to correct actual ingredient - it’s RETINOL, not AHA - sorry!)
OMG. I laughed out loud when I read this. I am sorry this happened to you, but of course you kept your sense of humor about it. And, you probably confused all those dudes at first, but then made their day, lol.
I've gotten lazy during covid and admittingly so, I have yet to run out of mascara. Lately, I have been paying a bit more attention to 'dressing up' for 'going out', even if for a short errand, although the former is much more comfortable.
I wonder whether genes play a role. Having basted myself with oil regularly while laying on a South Australian beach in my teenage years my skin is in remarkable condition but then my dad when he died at 98 had amazing skin which was commented on by nursing staff. Part of his secret was to moisturise his body everyday to help with eczema but I’m pretty sure his ‘skin genes’ were pretty spiffy too. 💐
Val, I have done double cleanse for years because the oil is the only way I can get off all of my makeup and SPF.
I use Tan Luxe drops year round to have a tan on my face and not wear foundation most days.
Recently I read that oils take off self tanner, which, if true, explains why I have to use the tanning drops every day or two to keep up the color.
1) Is it true that oil takes off self tanners? 2) How can I get my skin as clean as double cleanse without using an oil ?
Any solutions for the beginnings of crepey skin on the undersides of my upper arms? I'm wondering if sleeveless is a thing of the past! I'm using Biossance Body Toning Cream which helps short term, but is there anything else I can be doing? Thank you!
That moment of embarrassment. Men feel it too. We don't have bosoms we have to worry about, although a few do, I suppose--too much ice cream--but there are other devices we wold prefer to keep to ourselves. One of the delights of aging. Well, just brave it out. They,, too, will someday be in your shoes. We get old. Deal with it, strangers.
-Thank you Val, for such a huge embrace of empathy here. You are a beautiful being. xo