43 Comments

This post reinforces why I subscribed to How Not to F*ck Up Your Face. It so deeply resonates with me. Thank you for articulating my thoughts so well.

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My dad likes to philosophize with this question: "What do you see when you look in the mirror?" Answer: A reflection of light.

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Oct 4, 2022Liked by Valerie Monroe

went back to your mirror gazing/meditation column from last year. thank you. loved it. i'm going to offer it to my online self care group, with full credit to you!

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Thank you for this. Your thoughts on beauty resonate with me.

As I wrote in my book, "The people I find beautiful have calloused hands and smile lines and frizzy hair pulled back from a sweaty brow. They are people who get dirty with the business of life. Their beauty comes from within, from vigor and honest living."

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Feb 3, 2023Liked by Valerie Monroe

I started working at a new workplace this past August and lo and behold, if you go outside, one must walk past a row of reflective glass windows on the way to the dining hall (or a less crowded bathroom). I've been able to resist looking at my reflection because, guess what? Behind those windows are colleagues working in their offices. So, interestingly, my own vanity keeps me from checking out myself in those windows. That is, I don't want my colleagues to catch me looking at myself!

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Mary Oliver - an absolute favorite. And good on you for writing the postcards!!! xo

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Oct 4, 2022Liked by Valerie Monroe

Excellent post, as always, dear Val, brimming with wit and wisdom!

On the subject of mirrors, I once read that in her later years, when she no longer had the visage that had always been gorgeously lit and artfully photographed for the iconic films that helped to make her a legend, Marlene Dietrich covered all the mirrors in her Paris apartment so that she wouldn’t inadvertently catch a glimpse of her aging face.

If this tale is true, it’s sad, and too bad that Dietrich didn’t hightail it to The Louvre for a dose of art therapy. Or have access to your miraculous mirror meditation.

When I don’t take time for the mirror meditation, I do my best imitation of Barbra Streisand as Fanny Brice in “Funny Girl.” That scene where she gazes lovingly at her reflection and coos, “Hello, Gorgeous!” This makes me laugh, and just like that, the marionette lines disappear, the cheekbones are higher, the eyes are brighter, the overall mood is lighter. A DIY Face Lift for real!

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Hi Val! This is my favorite piece of yours yet. This line made my eyes sting: "After you’ve read about it, Just Do It. Then, Just Do It again. And again, till you actually see the person who lives behind your face."

I had a funny experience with self-objectification recently, which illustrates your point. I've been taking a couple of acting classes. I do one on-camera and one for voice overs. In the on-camera class, I'm never fully committed to my characters because I can't get past my self-awareness. In the VO class I can let it RIP. I never have trouble becoming someone else without the presence of a visual lens. So, glad to hear that my newfound dream to become a cartoon actor has roots in science.

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Oct 4, 2022·edited Oct 4, 2022Liked by Valerie Monroe

Hello, Ms. Monroe.

Hope you are doing very well.

Here I am, "talking" from my Doctor's office right now, reading this meanwhile waiting for a Peeling procedure myself.

Will definitely be showing my friend your insights!

Love from Brazil,

Ms. Thaissa.

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Oct 4, 2022Liked by Valerie Monroe

Count me awed.

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Oct 4, 2022Liked by Valerie Monroe

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ I want to share this with so many people. Would you consider making it an Instagram post?

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Oct 5, 2022Liked by Valerie Monroe

I didn’t see a thing about DIY face lift. Am I missing something. I’m new to blogs.

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This was amazing. What a great read and reminder! Thank you!

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Oct 4, 2022Liked by Valerie Monroe

I'm new to your column and found many nuggets of relevant information, including about the shoes you found in Tokyo, which is my home. Looking forward to reading more! Thank you.

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Oct 4, 2022Liked by Valerie Monroe

Val, happy tears after reading your inspiring post! Thank you for helping me focus on the beauty and awe of big picture.

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A wonderful edition of HNTFUYF. Thanks 😊

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