Val, thanks so much for the shout-out! ... and also for the grin that spread over my face reading this whole post. I love the reminder that NO ONE cares but us when we leave the house uncombed - or unDONE. Just today, I bumped into a normally-glammed-up neighbor perusing cold cuts at the supermarket. She was *sans* makeup and looked 10 yrs younger. When I said hello and complimented her youthful appearance, she pointed out her lone pimple which was barely visible and only made me love her more. Makeup can cover up a imperfect complexion... it also can hide our true selves.
If we ever meet, you will see that I am one of the palest people on the planet. In the days before sunscreen, I slathered on the Coppertone but never got bronzed (or coppered). My skin color went straight from maggot to lobster. My pale-faced people have a joke about this:
"What do you call an Irish tan?"
"Sunburn."
Thanks--yet again--for the excellent and always clear advice.
Val, nothing makes me happier than your continued success! I LOVE that HNTFUYF keeps growing. I've been digging my relationship with some of your other commenters--such smart, savvy folks here, ready to compassionately turn the beauty industry quietly upside down. Onward we go with the shares and likes and new eyeballs!
I'm definitely pretty high on the "ghost" scale (I do tan lightly, but have to be careful because I can burn easily) and the only self tanner I've found that works for my skin tone is Alba Botanica's Sunless Tanner. It tans VERY lightly, which annoys folks looking for a richer tan but works well if you're a very whitey mcwhiteperson. It also does not have that weird self tanner smell. As with all self tanner products, do a test when the stakes are low (not right before an event etc) to check that it works for you.
Hi Val, pale person, lover of Somebody Somewhere and fellow stalker as I've awakened my dormant street casting skills. A few months ago, in Best Buy, I saw an amazing woman beside me in the computer section, with salt and pepper dreads, oozing confidence that only comes with age. And guess what? We got her in front of the camera and she was amazing. Now this magazine art director wants to model. I’ll be sharing my secrets with her.
On to my question. The red lipstick you posted had me consumed with lust. The last time I wore red lipstick was in 1990 when I was a cocktail waitress at El Teddys in Tribeca and Cindy Lauper asked whose lipstick I was wearing. I was so taken aback that this great woman wanted to know the shade of lipstick that little ol me was wearing. It was a YSL something or other when she informed me she already had it. Of course she did! Anyway, I do not look good in red lipstick. I love it but cannot wear it. Not because I was always called, Elvira, it just looks hard on me. Any tips or tricks? Happy 4th!
A fantastic help, thank you! One of my favourite parts was your reminder that when you left the house without combing your hair no one cared but you. You totally rock Val, keep the message coming!
I quit drinking a few years ago. I wasn’t the stereotypical stumbling drunk person, rather a working soccer Mom who enjoyed a couple glasses of wine, sometimes more. I love that the conversation is opening up around alcohol and surprised my small town, where I am a well known health care professional, by talking about it.(I’m sorry if you posted an article about it somewhere else and I’m commenting here, I may have missed it.) I wrote a little about it here
Happy Fourth of July, dear Val! Excellent post as always. I have been spreading the HNTFUYF news and wouldn’t be surprised if Bridget Everett becomes a faithful reader—and loyal subscriber!
Re the red lips for pale complexions challenge, I am also a longtime fan of the Clinique Chubby Sticks. As an alternative for that lip stain effect, I sometimes simply line and fill in my lips with a drugstore lip pencil (currently Cover Girl Exhibitionist Lip Liner in Rosewood) and gloss over it with a ChapStick SPF 12. Does the trick!
My Sharona! Once I got into the pale, no blush, dark lip look myself. When MAC first started at Bendel's on 57th Street I tried Russian Red, which was all the rage. My rage was that it didn't look good on me. Then I tried a very dark deep vampire-esque color that worked. Go figya!
Thanks, Val. That calls to mind a Clinique stain I used to wear eons ago, called, Rum Raisin. I even remember purchasing it from a very different Bloomingdales. In those days, I worked at the very first Ann Taylor in New York on 57th Street, a specialty store, owned by Mimi and Richard Liebeskind of Joan and David fame. Mimi, the fashion director, handed me a burgundy and cream striped Dorothée Bis long tight knit dress and said, put this on. I was able to parade around in it while I worked and paired it with my Charles Jourdan knee high boots. One of my co-workers became a very famous makeup artist. Kids on a new journey in old Manhattan.
Hello Val, I am Scottish and almost a shade of pale blue! I have the added pink/ red rosacea face so make up is a minefield. On holiday just now using factor 50 sunscreen and hiding under trees. I’ve only just found your sub stack and it is great. X
Jul 4, 2023·edited Jul 4, 2023Liked by Valerie Monroe
“— but I’ll add a plea not to be meager with your kind words to anyone, because hearing them can be so heartening!” – No matter the question, kindness is always such a transformational answer! You Val, have proved yourself as a lady who cultivates just the right amount of it inside your heart and mind. Your success also means the victory of self compassion, no doubt. I so enjoy being here in HNTFUYF alongside this splendid group of humans. Xo.
I think Hair color has a lot to do with skin tone. I dyed my brunette hair for years to cover my gray. As I aged, I felt like I became more pale and washed out. At 55, I finally decided to quit coloring my hair and, now that I have gray hair, my complexion is warm and almost olive.
I’ve recently discovered “pink powder” - Jones Road Beauty is the one I’m living - and it does wonders for me. It seems to give my skin a little brightness with no shimmer or shine. Very hard to ex, but very flattering!
Val, thanks so much for the shout-out! ... and also for the grin that spread over my face reading this whole post. I love the reminder that NO ONE cares but us when we leave the house uncombed - or unDONE. Just today, I bumped into a normally-glammed-up neighbor perusing cold cuts at the supermarket. She was *sans* makeup and looked 10 yrs younger. When I said hello and complimented her youthful appearance, she pointed out her lone pimple which was barely visible and only made me love her more. Makeup can cover up a imperfect complexion... it also can hide our true selves.
If we ever meet, you will see that I am one of the palest people on the planet. In the days before sunscreen, I slathered on the Coppertone but never got bronzed (or coppered). My skin color went straight from maggot to lobster. My pale-faced people have a joke about this:
"What do you call an Irish tan?"
"Sunburn."
Thanks--yet again--for the excellent and always clear advice.
Val, nothing makes me happier than your continued success! I LOVE that HNTFUYF keeps growing. I've been digging my relationship with some of your other commenters--such smart, savvy folks here, ready to compassionately turn the beauty industry quietly upside down. Onward we go with the shares and likes and new eyeballs!
I'm definitely pretty high on the "ghost" scale (I do tan lightly, but have to be careful because I can burn easily) and the only self tanner I've found that works for my skin tone is Alba Botanica's Sunless Tanner. It tans VERY lightly, which annoys folks looking for a richer tan but works well if you're a very whitey mcwhiteperson. It also does not have that weird self tanner smell. As with all self tanner products, do a test when the stakes are low (not right before an event etc) to check that it works for you.
Hi Val, pale person, lover of Somebody Somewhere and fellow stalker as I've awakened my dormant street casting skills. A few months ago, in Best Buy, I saw an amazing woman beside me in the computer section, with salt and pepper dreads, oozing confidence that only comes with age. And guess what? We got her in front of the camera and she was amazing. Now this magazine art director wants to model. I’ll be sharing my secrets with her.
On to my question. The red lipstick you posted had me consumed with lust. The last time I wore red lipstick was in 1990 when I was a cocktail waitress at El Teddys in Tribeca and Cindy Lauper asked whose lipstick I was wearing. I was so taken aback that this great woman wanted to know the shade of lipstick that little ol me was wearing. It was a YSL something or other when she informed me she already had it. Of course she did! Anyway, I do not look good in red lipstick. I love it but cannot wear it. Not because I was always called, Elvira, it just looks hard on me. Any tips or tricks? Happy 4th!
A fantastic help, thank you! One of my favourite parts was your reminder that when you left the house without combing your hair no one cared but you. You totally rock Val, keep the message coming!
I quit drinking a few years ago. I wasn’t the stereotypical stumbling drunk person, rather a working soccer Mom who enjoyed a couple glasses of wine, sometimes more. I love that the conversation is opening up around alcohol and surprised my small town, where I am a well known health care professional, by talking about it.(I’m sorry if you posted an article about it somewhere else and I’m commenting here, I may have missed it.) I wrote a little about it here
https://open.substack.com/pub/donnamcarthur/p/my-sober-life?r=1z0b1o&utm_medium=ios&utm_campaign=post
Happy Fourth of July, dear Val! Excellent post as always. I have been spreading the HNTFUYF news and wouldn’t be surprised if Bridget Everett becomes a faithful reader—and loyal subscriber!
Re the red lips for pale complexions challenge, I am also a longtime fan of the Clinique Chubby Sticks. As an alternative for that lip stain effect, I sometimes simply line and fill in my lips with a drugstore lip pencil (currently Cover Girl Exhibitionist Lip Liner in Rosewood) and gloss over it with a ChapStick SPF 12. Does the trick!
My Sharona! Once I got into the pale, no blush, dark lip look myself. When MAC first started at Bendel's on 57th Street I tried Russian Red, which was all the rage. My rage was that it didn't look good on me. Then I tried a very dark deep vampire-esque color that worked. Go figya!
Thanks, Val. That calls to mind a Clinique stain I used to wear eons ago, called, Rum Raisin. I even remember purchasing it from a very different Bloomingdales. In those days, I worked at the very first Ann Taylor in New York on 57th Street, a specialty store, owned by Mimi and Richard Liebeskind of Joan and David fame. Mimi, the fashion director, handed me a burgundy and cream striped Dorothée Bis long tight knit dress and said, put this on. I was able to parade around in it while I worked and paired it with my Charles Jourdan knee high boots. One of my co-workers became a very famous makeup artist. Kids on a new journey in old Manhattan.
Always an awesome write. Even if I a not a pale-or I got a great face oil tip from it. Thank you. Very close to paying my membership!!!
Thanks for this, from another very pale person.
Hello Val, I am Scottish and almost a shade of pale blue! I have the added pink/ red rosacea face so make up is a minefield. On holiday just now using factor 50 sunscreen and hiding under trees. I’ve only just found your sub stack and it is great. X
“— but I’ll add a plea not to be meager with your kind words to anyone, because hearing them can be so heartening!” – No matter the question, kindness is always such a transformational answer! You Val, have proved yourself as a lady who cultivates just the right amount of it inside your heart and mind. Your success also means the victory of self compassion, no doubt. I so enjoy being here in HNTFUYF alongside this splendid group of humans. Xo.
Face oil... how do oily folks make it work? And does it go on after or before sunscreen? Thank you!
I think Hair color has a lot to do with skin tone. I dyed my brunette hair for years to cover my gray. As I aged, I felt like I became more pale and washed out. At 55, I finally decided to quit coloring my hair and, now that I have gray hair, my complexion is warm and almost olive.
I’ve recently discovered “pink powder” - Jones Road Beauty is the one I’m living - and it does wonders for me. It seems to give my skin a little brightness with no shimmer or shine. Very hard to ex, but very flattering!