16 Comments

Calvin Klein once passed me on the street here in Sag Harbor and gave me the once-over when I was in my early 50s, but I am so clearly not gay that I thought he might be thinking of me as a possible model. Well, those were the days. Now I aspire to look like Abraham Lincoln--inherently ugly, but yet handsome. But I won't work at it.. Men have it easy, though. Women? Not so much. For women my age, in their 80s, what you look for is visible character, the life well lived, the challenges met, the calm in their bearing and their face. It comes from inside, not from a facial cream or anything like that. So many of us now live to increasing old age. What you want is a deep smile, warmth, a history of having love and been loved. Acceptance of who you are. It makes so much difference. As we grow older, gender doesn't matter. What matters is how we handled our suffering.

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Val! This hits on something I've wondered about. While I don't love to think about this in too much detail, I noticed that after my mother met her boyfriend (4 years ago at age 66) her complexion underwent a transformation. They're long distance, and whenever she comes back from visiting him her whole face looks rosy and illuminated. I'm grateful for this bit of science around the flush of being in love!

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Jan 31, 2023Liked by Valerie Monroe

First, a round of applause for an excellent post and the richly deserved recognition for HNTFUYF!

Who knew that playing footsie can pay off with glowing skin? A welcome addition to the Good News department!

As for women in their 70s and 80s having their moment as models (“as long as their images aren’t photoshopped”), I am waiting for the day when we see faces that haven’t had extensive “work.” Love and admire Jane Fonda, but it makes me sad that she doesn’t even look like herself any more. Ditto for the forever fabulous Marlo Thomas. Just saw her on TV news segment and almost didn’t recognize her.

Which brings me to Heidi Waldorf’s sage advice re “skin-related effects of diminished estrogen.” Having been religious about gentle skin care and daily sun protection for decades, I’m sure my own loss of volume and softening contours are partly due to diminished estrogen levels. But even if I wanted to pursue a course of injectables and fillers, like many women today, I don’t have the financial resources to do so. The escalating prices of groceries alone keep me penny pinching in the drugstore skin care aisle and bargain hunting everywhere.

Thank goodness for your mirror meditation and HNTFUYF posts, and a life filled with the love of family and friends, for me, right now, much more uplifting than a course of injectables!

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Congrats on the nod for being a great health and beauty newsletter!

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Jan 31, 2023Liked by Valerie Monroe

Thank you for addressing skins issues related to hormone receptor positive breast cancer, early chemopause and skin quality.

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Jan 31, 2023Liked by Valerie Monroe

Val I think I must have good skin genes because I am not touchy feely nor was my mom 😆🤣 but luckily I am aging gracefully 😊.

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