Watch Your Tone(r)!

plus, a plea for harmony

Welcome readers, old and new. Last week’s brief bonus post on the outcome of the E. Jean Carroll trial precipitated a skirmish never before seen on the Elysian Fields of HNTFUYF.

I won’t deny you your feelings about anything here—but I’d prefer those feelings be expressed more in the vein of I beg to differ and believe this sets a dangerous precedent than You’re a f*cking idiot who deserves to die. Without minimizing the seriousness of the threats to our freedoms and our fragile republic, can we try to enjoy a kinder connection?

To show your affection for HNTFUYF and for each other, please turn to your neighbor, wish her a ravishing day, and hit the little ❤ button above. 🙏

My five-year-old granddaughter, M, still deeply invested in a frothy, gaudy, multi-bejeweled stage of sartorial development, often appears before me on our FaceTime chats decked out in a gown, elbow-length gloves, drop earrings, and a tiara. The other night she informed me she was Princess Snow White and that I should address her thusly. “Okay,” I said, “That’s new! And how is your family of seven little people?” She was momentarily perplexed. “Oh,” she said dismissively. “You mean that story. My Snow White is different.”

“Interesting!”

“My whole name is Snow White Monroe,” she said, “and I have a sister. She is also Snow White.”

“But how can people tell you apart?”

“Her whole name is Snow White Mabel Walsh,” said M.

 I burst into a laugh. “What? Where did that come from?” I said.

“Why are you laughing?” said M. “It’s her name. Don’t be unkind, Grammie.”

“You’re right,” I said, resolving to watch my tone.

Granted, it’s a leap from the level of acid in one’s voice to the level of acid in your skin but—whoopsie! Here we are! Because a curious reader—who often happens to be in my sightline—has a question about whether toner is necessary in her skincare routine.

A housekeeping note before we continue: Because there are many thousands of you reading these posts, which I assume is because you find them helpful in some way, and because bringing HNTFUYF to you requires what most of us believe would qualify as work, I’m going to experiment with putting the beauty Q&A behind a paywall once a month. For access to all posts, please become a paid subscriber. I’m even lowering the subscription rate for now to $40/year. How can you resist? xo