To Oil or Not to Oil?

plus, the magical and elusive jerberry

Welcome readers, old and new!

I know some of you are feeling melancholy about the end of summer… which, by the way, isn’t here yet. More than a week to go! I guess it’s anticipatory grief, but I have just the thing: Take your sad self over to Isabel Cowles Murphy’s The Noble Try for a delicious read about the birth of her fourteenth fourth son. If it doesn’t lift your spirits, I can also offer you a jerberry.

But first, please tap the ❤️ above to release the sweet odor of a newborn’s neck— guaranteed to lull all nations into world peace—into every home on earth.

About the jerberry. I’m not exactly sure what it is, but I’ve been told by a reliable source (M) that it’s like a fruit and about the size of a medium melon. It is delicious beyond belief (a key phrase necessary to appreciate it). The magical thing about the jerberry is that you can actually make one yourself. In fact, I have M’s permission to share the recipe with you.

Into a large bowl, mix:

Three pounds of sugar

Two eggs cracked, so they fall out of the shell

Three child-size mugs of fresh milk from cows; if it’s one or two days old, that’s okay—but three days old is no good

Two blackberries of any size—but for a medium jerberry, two medium blackberries

Maple syrup; exactly the amount you can see only in the neck of the bottle

As many peeled grapes as you like. Ten grapes is the max. NB: If you put in 100 grapes, the oven will explode

Some apple juice, a whole cup or a little bottle with a picture of an apple on it, all of that

Once everything is in the bowl, stir it with a spoon

Put it in the oven for one minute only!

When you remove this concoction from the oven, you have a delicious jerberry. I ask you, what wizardry is this? Probably not the kind you came to HNTFUYF for. But I think remembering the untamed, unqualified, intensely curious and unselfconscious state of beginner’s mind is key to a rich old age. I’m enjoying a slice of fresh jerberry right now.

A reader who prefers a rich old age without dry skin recently asked if oils are hydrating; the answer might surprise you.

The beauty Q&A in this post is available only to paid subscribers. For full access to all posts—and if you value payola- and ad-free work—please become a paid subscriber at the currently discounted rate of $40/year. If you can’t afford a subscription, send me an email at valeriemonroe.substack.com and I’ll comp you one, no questions asked. 🙏